Our Days

Are spent......

Playing chef and cooking together

Making food like a big guy....

Showing friends how we can stand up alone...

Giggling and performing for pretty girls...

Voting and learning about civil liberties...

Consuming cookies and learning to eat quickly before a little cookie monster swipes them....

Eating without parental assistance...

Just all around enjoying every minute of life....as long as naps are had of course!!!

What a day.....for a new princess to come

Some days you walk away from and there are just no words.....Today was such an amazing day in so many ways that I don't know if words will do it justice, but here goes.

This morning I got up and after getting ready and preparing my family for the day I went down to the hospital and waited with my sweet girlfriend Casie for her to deliver her baby. After 39 weeks of pregnancy and her labor starting and stopping she finally went in for an induction. We waited and waited for the doctor to come in because we knew nothing would happen until he broke her water. Upon arrival (several hours late and with a terribly rude demeanor) he broke her water, we began pacing the labor and delivery floor, sitting on the yoga ball and moving around.....labor began to commence and very quickly proceeded. Casie was amazing......she labored beautifully and with such grace and calmness. Going at it without medications, pain reducers or any other drugs she labored for a few hours and then I was privileged to be with her and assist her, in such a small way, as she brought forth sweet Miss Olivia Jane Porter into this world.

The entire process was humbling to witness. Having only ever been in a delivery room as the mother to be and not as a bystander the entire process is so different! To witness someone you love and care for in true agony and unable to release them of pain is hard! To feel helpless to change things, to sit back and see them struggle, knowing words and touches are hardly enough to comfort. To witness the miracle of a healthy birth and beautiful pink baby is an awesome experience. In the sense that you are just in awe of it.

A lot of prayers were said today in that delivery room. For the mother, the doctors and nurses, the baby, for myself even that I would actually be strong enough to endure the process with her and not chicken out :) As I process all of this and even still I can't wrap my head around all that has happened, I am so deeply humbled at the beauty of God's gift in life. Of His amazing presence in all things, His intricate design for life and the mighty way he knits all of it together.

Whatever one thinks about life and the origin and design of it all, I know today I witnessed a beautiful miracle. I saw the creator at work and as He painted forth a new life on this earth I got to be a witness to His great power. I look back and see not just how He paints the life and birth of it, but my heart swells with joy as I look back and see also how he has knit together our lives as friends over the past 5 years. I never would have thought when I met Casie on our old church property and was pregnant with my first little boy that years later I would be allowed the honor of being with her as she gave birth to her first daughter. And yet, He purposed so much before the beginning of time.

I so look forward to watching His hand at work in my life, in Casie's life and in the lives of our sweet little ones in the years to come. And I will continue to write our stories, so one day, when I need a reminder I can look back and see how Sovereign my Jesus is.

Olivia Jane Porter
January 25, 2012
8 lb 1.7 oz
21 inches long
1:39 p.m.

Little Engineers

MJD and Jackson have been friends forever. Literally since I was pregnant with him have we known Jackson. So the boys have always played together. Over the years there have been good seasons of playdates and some seasons when playing together was a bit of a challenge. But at this age the boys love getting together and doing what boys do best, gathering branches, cutting and building. They said they were "being engineers" which is quite funny since both their dads really are engineers.

Home Base

In baseball a batter gets up to play with the sole goal of hitting the ball hard enough to get himself or his teammate back to home base.

A safe zone.

The security zone.

Where nothing can harm them, where they return after their run around the field, where they go to celebrate with their team on their accomplishment, or even in some cases just where they return when they have been called out by the umpire.
The beginning spot and their ending zone.
Home Base.

As the sun peaks into the horizon this morning, I have a little nine month old snuggled up on my arm with a grasp around it that won't let go, or allow me to fall back asleep. And yes, every futile attempt to move him wakes him up and he proceeds to snuggle closer and tighter.
For a brief moment I was annoyed, doesn't he know mama wanted to sleep some more?
Then it settled. Home Base.

For only a few more short months I will proceed to remain his whole world, source of comfort, food, fun, safety, security, shelter, and so much more. But as he gets bigger and more independent his world will shift, as it did with my big one, and Mommy will have to step back and let Daddy take the place of his whole world. It is a hard place to be in, to see coming, to acknowledge, and to be strong enough to move through successfully. I know why so many women struggle to release their boys over to their fathers as they grow, it is hard. Yet I know the importance of the process and how God uses that time to build a warrior from a boy, and more than my selfish desires, I do want my boys to be His warriors. And I am so grateful for such a wonderful earthly father for my boys who will help lead them to know Jesus and wants the same desires of my heart for them.

As I lay here and ponder these things, with a sweet little breathe on my arm it brings tears to me. Not just as I think about my boys growing too quickly and my inability to slow life down, but because in the stillness of the morning God reminded me I am blessed to be the Home Base for my boys. I can be their beginning launching pad and their safe zone when they return from adventuring this life, I want so desperately to do this as well as I can, through His grace, to always be their Home Base. The one to stand and wait to celebrate their success, comfort their pain, learn from their losses, and finish this game of life well with them.
As I think about the joy my heart swells with at just the thought of this, He reminds me that He wants me to call Him my home base as well. And that without my going to Him, I won't ever adequately be enough for my own kids.

I know, a little much for a sunrise post, but isn't sleep overrated anyways as a mom? Besides now that my thoughts are out, my big boy is awake and ready to play :)

Bean gets snipped

Bean finally got a little hair trimmed his morning. His hair is so fine and longer than his Daddy or brother that it won't look right as short as theirs so I have wanted to keep it a little longer. But the comb over on the front was getting a little too long and out of control when he got hot or after sleeping, so I snipped some this morning when all the boys got buzzed. Not the best but it will do till the rest of his hair fills in on the side and back.

Blasted RSV

Liam went for his 9 month well visit with just a little cough and a slightly snotty nose. We walked out with a diagnosis of RSV.... Yuck!

In the next three days we visited the doctor again twice, went home with breathing treatments to open up his lungs the first time and then antibiotics the second time because his ear became cloudy from the backed up fluid in his system and the doc didn't want us miserable or in the ER over the weekend.

It has been a rough week! My happy go lucky, content and noisy baby couldn't even cry for days. He whimpered and laid on me while his body temperature climbed.

I swear RSV was originated in the pit of hell an it is Satan's creation to torture mothers. Listening to each grunted breathe throughout the whole night, watching each inch of his chest struggle for air, praying his body is getting what it needs. Watching him turn away food, struggle to nurse.

So the last few weeks have been rough in our home. The lack of sleep finally attacked me and I went into the walk in clinic with a terrible ear infection and walked out with 4 prescriptions to clear it up.

Fevers have finally broken, breathing is a little better. Food is once again being consumed and some rest is occurring. But the nights are still hard on him.
And while the doctor said he can be around other children again on Tuesday, the cough may linger upwards of close to a month :/

Here is the little Bean doing a breathing treatment wit Daddy. He is so strong and brave for such a little guy.

To remember

Monday Liam learned how to say " momma"

I love hearing it....even though I think he says it because he knows I bring food with me when I come to him :)

737

That was my bib number in my first running event!

I completed my first 5K yesterday....I would say I ran it, but honestly I didn't run the entire time. I probably should have run more of it, but it wasn't timed and it was a charity event so I decided to enjoy the fellowship with a friend and just walk with her and then run when she wanted to....either way it was great exercise and fun.

Since I didn't finish the full Couch to 5K training before the event I think I'm going to sign up for another one so I keep up the habit of running.

Three Quarters and Great Success

I am amazed that my little bean in officially 3/4 of a year old today.....how did that happen? I swear 9 months of pregnancy didn't fly by like that!

Today, while I was doing his laundry and sorting his clothes Bean was playing on the rug behind me. I propped him up to standing position on the music table and then he toppled over so I went back to my task....when I turned around to check on his giggling I discovered him up, all by himself!!!!! Ever so proud of his accomplishment and then very uncertain as to what comes next. Luckily I was able to grab the camera and get a few shots!

8 Month Bean

Considering the fact that he will be 9 months tomorrow morning....I figured I should post this while he was still technically 8 months :)

*At 8 months you learned how to get around the house by a combination of rolling, and doing a "GI Joe" move.....but man are you getting quick!
* You love to eat.....all things, mostly table food and scream at top of your lungs for food each time we sit you in a high chair.
* You learned how to sip out of a straw and now want anything we are drinking.
* We actually got you to crawl across the room just by accidentally placing a Starbucks cup down with a big green straw in it....you wanted the straw and you got it!
* You love to giggle at your brother and daddy.
* You still prefer mama over others but are getting much better about going to family members and being away from me.
* Nursing 4 times a day and eating food at every chance you get.
* You love the CFA peppermint milkshake, totally stole my the other day!
* Definitely prefer to stand to hold hands and pretend you can walk, but you're happy to play on the floor.
* Are starting to really love playing with toys and like any and all kids of trucks and cars.
* You have officially cut 5 teeth, and the 6th is almost all the way in....terrible business teeth!!!
* Love to snuggle in bed at about 4-5 a.m. but much prefer to fall asleep in your crib to begin with.
* Love sleeping in the car seat.
* Did a great job opening presents for Christmas.
* You love to eat all things sweet.
* Have now consumed 2 slices of pizza (small ones and minus the crust) on a regular basis.
* Your face lights up and you smile when you hear your Nena on the phone.
* Adore Mocha and love whenever she braves getting near you.
* Were able to capture your Tia Gabi's dog on the last visit and stole a good chuck of his tail out!
* Are a sweet little bean and make us all smile so much during the day.

Time out TRAUMA

Little Bean had his first run in with the law.......the Mommy Police has captured him red handed in the process of pulling dvds off the entertainment shelf.....so after this.....

a stern "NO!" and getting placed back into his play area, we got this.......

(Yes, that is him crying, screaming and tearing up, only for a short moment though.)