Bob's death and his eternal life

I went to a funeral today, and it's striking to me the dichotomy of joy and sorrow that took place. Bob was the son our my first youth pastor, a boy I had briefly known from school and church, a friend of my husband's from childhood. I had heard of his death last week the day after he died, and I remember feeling a sense of sadness and a surprising sense of relief. I don't know where the relief came from, it was one I had never felt before. I can't say I knew Bob well and therefore the emotions I felt of the news of his death began to set my thoughts in motion. Is this the experience of a true Christian? Is this what it's all really supposed to feel like, sorrow for your loss but joy for heaven's gain?
I have always been a person that struggles with my faith because faith evokes me to believe in something I cannot control. It requires me to trust in the unseen and release the hold of power I so earnestly seek. For many years the question of death has been a challenge. I don't like the unknown, and while I know there is life after death the fact that I don't have a detailed step by step guide to follow leaves a lot of uncertainty for my over compulsive brain. Nevertheless, death in its entirety has always caused me concern. Over the past week, in the brief moments of quiet I very seldom receive, I have found that Bob's death has changed the way I view death. It's as if a sense of peace about death has washed over me. Bob's life faced many physical challenges that could easily have taken his life is a terrible or tragic way, and while the incident of his death is saddening, as I sat at the memorial and listened to the pastor share about the death I realized how gracious God truly is in taking Bob is such a joyous manner. I know that sounds foolish, death as joyous, but it's true. Rather than being in a medically sterile room with tubes or monitors due to a seizure or accident, Bob was enjoying the day with friends in the beauty of creation. It's interesting how he hand of God works in times of sorrow such as this to provide clarity and perspective to things one rarely contemplates on an everyday basis. The sorrow of the situation for those survived is that it takes such situations to make one contemplate the preciousness of life.
The grace of God was so evident to me tonight, not simply in the legacy that Bob left behind, but in the strength of his family. As a mother, I cannot begin to imagine the grief that Carolyn must have felt and will forever feel. The heartache Mark feels in losing a son would seem too much to bear, yet while they have the look of weariness in their faces and pain in their eyes, you can clearly see the precious power of love that is sustaining them. It is almost as if you can physically see God walking beside each of them providing them with each step, each smile, each tear to make it through the moment. I am humbled to see such grace, such strength, and such love. I know it is evident in my life, I think I have just too busy to be grateful for each instance.